OK so my last post about acting and all that got me thinking about just how much I do actually cover up and only let out when I'm in the skin of an imagined character.
The realisation that I hide my true feelings quite a lot disturbed me.
I'm getting fed up of living with this secret [alopecia]. I know everyone has their burdens to bear so I'm not going down give-me-sympathy-lane here but I'm just so tired of getting up every morning and going out wearing this mask.I've taken more and more to not bothering to try and hide my patchy head when I'm in the company of friends,after all,they're my friends,it shouldn't really bother them.I know it's not particularly pleasant to look at and I'm aware that it probably puts them in a bit of an uncomfortable situation if I'm sitting there,bald patches on display.
I'm starting to wonder if maybe it would be easier to just come out with it?It's not thaaat big a deal.Well,on one hand,it is.But on the other,its only appearance.And when I'm covered up,you can't really tell there's anything different about me.
I would just like to be able to have the freedom to move my head about without the worry of people discovering my secret,I'd be able to relax and know that people know what it is.
I don't know what my big thing about people knowing about it is,all I know that since I found out about it,the first priority for me has always been covering it up.
Maybe I'm disgusted by it? But I'm not because recently I've been feeling a lot better about the whole situation.
It's just getting to me having to live behind a mask and keep this big secret basically all to myself.
Living behind a mask is hard work,what do you's say to me taking it off?
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